A Reflection

"Worry about nothing; pray about everything."  

My mother-in-law says this often... and she really does mean it.  The last time she came to visit, just in passing, she reminded me, "Stef, worry about nothing... pray about everything."  

Now, if you know me at all, you know that I am a WORRY-WERT.  Seriously.  That's been my nickname for quite some time now.  If there's something to worry about, I'll find it.  And if there's not... well, I make up something to worry about.  My social worker at our adoption agency, Toni, can verify this, I'm sure. :)

So, on Friday night Nate and I FINALLY went on a date.... ahhhh... so refreshing.  We really needed to slow down and spend some time together.  So, in the midst of our conversation, I mentioned this quote, and I was telling Nate about how much it now meant to me... "Worry about nothing; pray about everything."  I was talking about the unknowns of us passing court, when we would travel, how that would work out with other summer commitments we'd already made, etc, etc.  And, I said to Nate, " . . . but, you know, I honestly believe that whatever is best for Jordan and for us will happen."  And I really did mean it.... I really did.

Nate smiled.  That's when he said, "Stef, that sounds like trusting God.  You're actually trusting God instead of worrying about it!"  

It was like all of Chili's restaurant stood still for that moment.  NO WAY!!!!  I'm actually trusting God for something!!!  Holy cow!!!!  I wanted to run up and down the aisles of the restaurant sharing this HUGE news in my life:  

GOD IS ACTUALLY GRACIOUS ENOUGH TOWARD THIS LITTLE WORRY-WERT TO NOT GIVE UP ON ME, BUT TO TEACH ME THROUGH THESE LAST 4 YEARS TO FINALLY START TRUSTING HIM!!!

Now, for those of you who have no trouble trusting God (like my husband) this is not HUGE news... but for the worry-werts in the room like me, how AMAZING is our God to be so patient with us that he would lovingly take us on journeys of faith like this?  A.M.A.Z.I.N.G.

So... I just needed to get this in writing, so that when that worry starts to creep in again, I can be reminded of God's purpose in this journey and not let the enemy have a stronghold!  I am free!!!!  I get to stop worrying.... look at God's faithfulness, Stef, in these last 4 years of your desire to be a mom.... keep your eyes on HIM.... because HE obviously knows what is the very best for you!!!!  Praise God!!!

Thanks for listening, friends!  And thank you for praying for us on this journey!